© Copyright 2022 by Lisa Rivers
Photo courtesy of Flikr.
honey I'm not Laughing at you, I’m laughing with you. And
after time passes you will be laughing." She said. " I
"Really Mom”, I screamed in horror, “Do you see me laughing? How could I be so lame? I mean really. What kind of mother sends a child out like that. I can never show my face again, never!”
And so the stage was set for day two of our three day spiritual retreat, my mother called “girls weekend”.
It started when we were just waking up and my mother asked if I would go to the hotel lobby and grab us some coffee. Not thinking it through, I agreed. So I walked through the courtyard and to the office where I poured three cups of coffee and put lids on them. Then I took a fourth cup and filled it full of powdered creamer and headed back towards the room.
Now here is where it gets dicey. I didn't notice that the lobby door opened inward, which left me no free hands. So I did what any intelligent person would do first thing in the morning, I stacked all three coffee cups, one on top of the other, and placed the open cup of powdered creamer on tip top. I then rested my chin in the creamer cup leaving my right hand free to pull open the door.
That is when the unthinkable happened. I looked up and there he was, the cute boy from our youth class and he was approaching the office. I had no choice but to keep moving, so I pulled the door open and walked through. I was instantly aware of my vulnerability, just as I suspect Eve felt immediately after eating the forbidden fruit.
But here's the crux, while passing he said hello and I responded by saying “hi” in a voice I have not since repeated. It was soft and breathy and when the “H” flowed from my mouth so did this puff of air that was forced into the cup of powdered creamer that my chin was resting in, blowing the creamer up and out of the cup and directly into my nostrils. Horrified, I ran all the way back to my room seeking comfort from my mother. What I got was a laugh that has haunted me to this day and a loathing for powdered creamer.
This experience was the first of many on my path, leaving me with some of my most treasured memories and comedic moments. And yes, mother was right, I do laugh my ass off. I woke up one day and realized that what happened to me during my younger years, particularly times most humiliating, have been instrumental in shaping the woman that I have become today.
Confident, respected, talented, and caffeine free.
am the owner of Maggie May Creations and Gift Baskets in Klamath
Falls, Oregon. I am the sales and marketing director of
RePurpos-ity, which is the repurposing and upcycling furniture store,
owned by my husband Michael and I.
am a champion for any program that sets out to preserve the dignity
of any human being, allowing all to feel the safety and comfort of
having a home, regardless of your situation or background.
Stabilizing mankind one man, one woman, one family at a time.
love for storytelling didn't come to fruition until later in life for
me. I needed to first have the freedom to express myself and then the
courage to believe in myself.
hope that my stories, my art, my life can be an inspiration to just
one person. That is what I write for, what I paint for, and what I