Reconciliation During Confinement
Copyright 2020 by Schadrac
Junior Ondongo Bongo
Photo by Pablo Heimplatz on Unsplash
is a gift that must be grasped because it is precious and short.
was in March 2020 that the epidemic (Covid-19) was declared to the
city of Turin. Everyone was afraid when the first case was announced,
because we have all seen the ravages of this virus in China. And the
government had declared a state of health emergency.
a nursing assistant in a retirement home and mother of a 5 month old
child, I had a very big decision to make between confining myself at
home and confining myself in my workplace.
understaffed, so I decided to confine myself to my workplace. In the
early days of our confinement, everything was fine, and we were doing
our job as usual. But over time, frustration, fatigue... began to win
us over since life had become monotonous. And through smartphones we
were able to have contact with the outside world.
days were getting longer and longer so that sometimes we forgot the
notion of time. Those who I used to take care of in the course of my
work, at the time of confinement I had our eyes on them. They had
become my new family. Among the residents of the retirement home was
a certain John.
was a widower and had a great deal of experience in marriage. Hence,
I often came to see him for advice from him since I was newly
day while I was taking care of him, John said to me: Lilian, how is
your husband? I replied: He is well. He added: Are you sure? I
replied: I spoke with him this morning, and he told me that
everything was fine.
says to me: There are certain things buried inside of us that we
cannot express through a virtual conversation. But only when the
person is in front of us.
being on the same wavelength as John, I did not understand what he
was trying to tell me or the message he was trying to get me across.
And I say clearly to John: What are you trying to make me understand?
answered me: It is very good that you do for us, and we are very
grateful to you. I replied: It is my job and it is completely normal
since I am paid for it.
said to me: Have you also thought about your other work?
said to him: Which one?
answered me: The one whose wife and mother you are.
John said that, I started to smile because I thought it was funny to
compare professional work and my family life. Because for me, my
family life was nothing like a job.
I answered John: All is well in my home. This answer that I had given
to John was just to cover my face because in truth, my decision to
confine myself to my workplace had not pleased my husband.
finished my conversation with John, I called my husband again.
said darling, how are you?
answered me: I am well and you?
replied: I am well. And I said to him: How is it going with the baby
replied: It is fine!
down, I knew it was not right, and he said to him: Honey, I know it
is wrong and my decision had hurt you a lot, but every time I call
you, you give me the impression that everything is fine. Why are you
husband replied: What do you want me to say? You left against my
will, by leaving us alone when we needed you the most. Michael and I
have learned to do without you, and we live as best we can.
calm him down a bit, I said to him: I miss you very much, and I
regret the decision I had made. You're right, it is in difficult
times that we recognize these true friends. I am sorry! Can you
replied: Michael is crying! And it's time that I give him his bottle.
Then he cut the call short.
I went to John again. And John said to me: What is happening to you?
I replied: My husband has a tooth against me, and I don't know what
to do to go up the slope.
answered: Do you know where this problem came from?
replied: Yes, I confined myself here rather than at home, and it did
not please him.
answered: Can I ask you a somewhat relevant question?
replied: Yes, you can!
said to me: If it was your husband who had confined himself outside
the house and without your approval, what would be your reaction?
laughed, when John asked me that question. Because knowing my nature,
if my husband did what I had done, surely he would experience hell
upon his return. Hence, I replied to John: I had done something
really wrong. Because he and I are one flesh. And each decision that
I will make, I must consult it beforehand to have its approval.
I picked up my phone to call my husband. When he picked up, I started
to cry. He tells me what is it darling?
replied: I have hurt the people who matter most in my life, and I let
them down when they needed me the most. I am a bad person.
my husband said to me: No darling, you are the most beautiful Woman
in the world, you are a wonderful wife, and I bless heaven every day
for having put you on my way. You have a very good heart; you are
compassionate, and you are a great mother.
married you because I knew how to detect all these good characters in
you. But sometimes it happens that we do bad things. But when you
recognize your faults and leave them behind, you get mercy. Because
tomorrow maybe it will be me who will need and need your forgiveness.
a week after this reconciliation, the government decided to
deconfinement. And I went back to mine.
of the message
won't know where to send it.)
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